Why Christmas Hates Me

I have a love/hate relationship with Christmas. I love it. It hates me.
I still believe in Santa Claus, but he's starting to piss me off. In five years Santa hasn't left one present under the tree for my son! He's a good kid. He doesn't deserve this. Santa hasn't brought me anything either, but I understand. He's neglected me ever since I moved out of my parent's house.
I thought this was supposed to be a cheery holiday, but every year the wild hordes